Pastor Wayne Cordeiro
May 12, 2002 - W0219

One of the best gifts we have are the gift of peopleÖ in our moms. They have such an important role in the development of our children, and in shaping our world. And today, weíre going to learn some indispensable life lessons from some Bible moms.

Question 1: What is one of your favorite life lessons you learned from your own mom? How has it made a difference in your life?

The first mom was a woman whose actions were so wise, she was able to prevent a war and even caught the eye of a future king. This woman and her legacy wasÖ

1.      Abigail: WISDOM

Abigail married a simple sheepherder, Nabal, who soon became rich. His newfound wealth, however, made him harsh and evil. It was his wifeís wisdom that would untangle his foolishness.

ìThe manís name was Nabal, and his wifeís name was Abigail. And the woman was intelligent and beautiful in appearance, but the man was harsh and evilÖî (1 Sm. 25:3).

At that time, David was running for his life in the same desert. And instead of marauding Nabalís flocks for himself and his many warriors, they protected them from other robbing bands. When the annual sheep-shearing festival came up, David sent some men to ask Nabal for a few sheep to share in the celebration. Instead of sharing from his abundance, Nabal kicked them out, calling David, ìjust another runaway slave.î

When David heard this he swore that by the next morning Nabal and his entire household would be dead. He and his 400 mighty warriors set out on a hunt and destroy mission. Meanwhile, one of Nabalís servants ran to Abigail and told her what had happened. She quickly gathered the best produce from her household and rushed out to intercept David and his bloodthirsty mercenaries.

Through her wisdom, Abigail teaches us three gems. First wasÖ

?        The Art of Diffusing ANGER.

ìShe fell at his feet and said, ëMy lord, let the blame be on me aloneíî (1 Sm. 25:24 NIV).

Instead of putting the blame on the guilty party where it belonged, she took it upon herself. She could have indicted her husband, making David and his men even more mad. But instead of bringing an indictment against him, Abigail chose to intercede for him.

Why would she do such a thing? Abigail understood the necessity of diffusing anger. Why?  Because healing cannot take place until anger is diffused. The way to do that is to take the initiative in apologizing, even when itís not your fault. There can be a low-grade fever of discontent in your relationship, but if you initiate the effort to diffuse the anger it can bring healing into the situation. You see, itís not the depth of discouragement thatís lethal to a marriage, itís the length of discouragement that lays waste to marriages.

Question 2: Do you have a relationship situation right now where healing needs to be introduced? Is there a way for you to diffuse the anger by initiating an apology?

Abigail understood the principle of initiating healing by diffusing the anger of the king. At that point she moves into the second gem of wisdom byÖ

?        Speaking a Future PROMISE.

ìThe Lord will certainly make for my lord an enduring houseÖ and evil shall not be found in you all your daysî (1 Sm. 25:28).

Start speaking a promising future into your life, your marriage and your family. We often do the opposite by speaking negatively, but God is telling us to start speaking His promises into our lives and the lives of our loved ones. Start painting your future with the same vibrant and bold colors He uses! That doesnít mean denying there are problems, but when you do speak about problems, always speak of them as changing. That introduces an element of hope. And thatís what God has for you ìa future and a hopeî (Jer. 29:11).

Activity: Identify a Scripture promise you would like to speak into your life or into your family. Log this in your journal, pray it for your family & commemorate it in your home.

Finally, Abigailís wisdom allowed her toÖ

?        Understand GIFT GIVING.

ìAnd now let this gift which your maidservant has brought to my lord be given to the young men who accompany my lordî (1 Sm. 25:27).

The Bible says, ìDo not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with goodî (Rom. 12:21). Donít remain neutral in a situation. If you want to overcome evil then you have to be proactive and do good. Tip the scales on the side of good and sometimes that involves gift giving.

Itís easy to withhold gifts of encouragement, affirmation and even a simple thank you. We have a tendency to drop our gift givingónotes of appreciation, thank yous, and words of encouragement slowly atrophy and disappear from our relationships. Does it help? Of course not, it actually accelerates the downslide. And we wonder why everything gets so barren so quickly.

ìA quietly given gift soothes an irritable person, a heartfelt present cools a hot temperî (Pr. 21:14 The Message).

Question 3: When was the last time you gave your friends or family a giftóa word of encouragement, praise, a thank you, a note? Was it recent or not-so-recent & why?

Activity: Think of a gift you can give a loved one this coming week. Identify what you would like to do for themówhether big or smallóto recognize their value in your life.

Inherit this legacy from Abigail, a mother of great wisdom. She understood the importance of diffusing anger, speaking promises and giving gifts. Hereís another weíre going to visitÖ

2.      Hannah: PRAYER

Hannah was the mother of Samuel, a great prophet, judge and priest in Israelís history. But before she had him, she had been barren for a very long time. It got to the point where she became the butt of other peoplesí jokes. This led Hannah to prayÖ hard. And not only did she pray but she made a decisive life choice because of her prayers:

ìAnd she made a vow and said, ëÖI will give him to the Lord all the days of his lifeíî (1 Sm. 1:11).

?        Make a Personal Life COMMITMENT.

Hannah didnít just pray the run-of-the-mill prayer: ìNow I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keepÖî No! She prayed and made a dedicated life commitment based on that prayer. When you pray in this way, no longer is God a celestial Santa Claus who gifts you with what you desire. He becomes God of the Universe, whom you submit your life to. And when that happens, He is able to unleash the resources of heaven into your life. Hannahís lifestyle was directly connected to her prayer life.

ìëFor this boy I prayedÖ So I have also dedicated him to the Lord; as long as he lives he is dedicated to the Lord.í And he worshiped the Lord thereî (1 Sm. 1:27-28).

Question 4: Howís your prayer life? Is it run-of-the-mill or life-impacting? Why?

What are you known for? Wisdom? Prayer? You should be. Let God put those seeds in your heart as an embryonic legacy. There is no greater gift. The last legacy comes from the third momÖ

3.      Mrs. Manoah: LIFE EXAMPLE

This lady was the wife of Manoah and the mother of Samson. The angel of the Lord came to her and prophesied about her future child. Yet his first instruction had nothing to do with Samson, and everything to do with her: ìThen the angel of the Lord appeared to the woman, and said to her, ëBe careful not to drink wine or strong drink, nor eat any unclean thingíî (Judges 13:3-4).

Who does it start with, the child? No, the instruction starts with the lifestyle of the parent. God is more concerned with your lifestyle than your childís. Heís saying that more important than any of the instructions you may give as a parent is the instruction you provide through your own life example.

If your lifestyle is inconsistent, then everything else is useless! Why is it so important to have a model lifestyle? Because as our kids grow up, more is caught than taught. I can lecture my kids all day long, but what will influence them more is my lifestyle. Weíre to be living examples of Godís own character.

Therefore, the best thing I can do as a father is to be a man of God. The best way to teach honesty is to make truth the rule of my own tongue. The best way I can pass on a strong work ethic is by being a hard worker. The lesson is not so much to try to change my kids, as it is to change myself and become an exemplary parent.

Question 6: What is the life example youíre projecting to your children? Is it consistent with your words? How are you doing well in this area, and where do you need to improve?

Once youíre able to do this, and gain a credible lifestyle, God will entrust to you an intuitive sense of your childís future. That includes providing guidance on how your child should grow and develop. And thatís our final gem from the legacy of Mrs. ManoahÖ

?        God gives Special INSIGHT of Our Futures to Mothers

ìAnd Manoah said, ëWhat shall be the boyís mode of life and his vocation?í So the angel of the Lord said to Manoah, ëLet the woman pay attention to all that I saidíî (Judges 13:12-13 emphasis mine).

ìTrain up a child in the way he should go, even when he is old he will not depart from itî (Pr. 22:6). 

God has a future for every single child, a design for a successful life. Heís ready to provide for that future, He only asks that you help to release those dreams for your child. How do you do this? God will entrust you with prophetic insight of his or her character and gifts. These will be revealed through their gifts and their passions, giving you an inkling of their inclination for the future. Weíre not to raise our children in the way that we think they should go, but in the way God would have them to go. Then you can steer and encourage them in the ways of the Lord.

God gives us these wonderful legacies through the example of great moms. There is no greater legacy than to be known for a parent of wisdom, a parent of prayer and a parent of life example.

Final Question: What point most impacted you in this lesson? Why?

Summarized by Dawn Obrien